Four Tips for a Great Elevator Pitch

(Spoilers: Get Out)

An elevator pitch is named after the idea that if you happen to find yourself in an elevator with a Hollywood big shot, you will have a captive audience for about thirty to sixty seconds, allowing you to give them a quick pitch of your idea. Now, I would not actually advocate pitching someone you’ve never met in an elevator. Their defenses will go up and your chances of a sale are bad – but the chance they will remember you in a negative light is good.

However, there are many situations where a very brief pitch is useful. Any networking event or social situation where you could meet industry people is likely to lead to the question, “What are you working on?” A great quick pitch could be the start of a productive relationship. Or in a general meeting you may discover the producer or executive is looking for something that’s just like a spec script you already have. Give them a great elevator pitch, and they will probably ask to read it.

So, how do you craft a great elevator pitch? Here are four tips. I’ll use Get Out (written by Jordan Peele) as an example of each one, culminating in a possible elevator pitch of that film.

1. Start with the title, genre, tone, and rating. When you have a limited amount of time, you need to give as much information as possible in as few words as possible. Don’t make the listener guess what kind of story you are telling. Identifying a genre is a quick way to provide a ton of information. And don’t make them guess whether it’s a comedy or drama, or what the likely rating might be. These labels are how the industry classifies films. Let them know how to classify yours.

Example from Get Out: If you don’t tell us that this is a horror movie, your description of a Black man meeting his white girlfriend’s parents might sound like a relationship drama or even a romantic comedy.

2. Be sure you’re conveying the appeal of the concept. Think hard about why someone would want to see this movie. What is the joy of this story? That is the single most important thing to bring out in your elevator pitch. You’d be amazed how often writers fail to convey the most interesting aspect of their idea when they have to condense the story.

Example from Get Out: What makes Get Out special? I’d say it’s the satire of racial attitudes among liberal white people. So you would want to make sure this aspect is clear in the elevator pitch.

3. Describe your character in a way that makes it clear why it’s interesting to see them in this story. In an elevator pitch, you will only have a few words to set up the character. You should describe the aspect of the character that is most relevant to the story you are going to tell. Most of the time, their name is not what’s important, nor is it their gender. So don’t describe the character as “Chris” or as “a guy.” These things don’t tell us anything about him that will make your pitch more interesting. Find a more specific description.

Example from Get Out: What makes Chris the most interesting character to get caught up in a nefarious body-swapping plot? It’s not just because he’s Black (though that is critically important to the concept). It’s because he’s non-confrontational, trying to go along and not make waves. To survive, he’s going to have to overcome this reticence.

4. Eliminate details that don’t add to the thirty-second version of your story. It’s obvious that you won’t be able to describe all the great aspects of your story in thirty seconds. But it can be hard to let go of elements that are important in the full-length script. Once you’ve crafted your elevator pitch, examine every phrase. Is the information adding to the appeal of the story in this brief summary? Will a listener who has no idea what is in the screenplay understand the significance of the information?

Example from Get Out: The sunken place is a crucial detail in the movie. So is the weird auction. And so are characters like the maid, groundskeeper, and the girlfriend’s hyper-aggressive brother. But there is probably not room to include these things in an elevator pitch, at least not in a manner that makes it clear why they are so cool in the movie.

So here is an example of an effective elevator pitch for Get Out that you could probably say in less than a minute:

My story is called Get Out. It's an R-rated horror movie about a reserved Black photographer who goes to meet his girlfriend’s parents at their remote estate. Creepy things start to happen, which the photographer at first attributes to the well-meaning cluelessness of his liberal hosts. But after he’s hypnotized by his girlfriend’s mother, he realizes he’s trapped in a nefarious plot and will have to overcome his fears to escape.

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The third edition of The Hollywood Pitching Bible is out! If you are in Los Angeles, Ken Aguado and I will be doing a book signing at Book Soup at 7 pm on September 26th. We’d love to see you there! You can RSVP here which will help us ensure we have enough books on hand.

 

Are you Crazy? Don't wait.  Buy this book now! Ken Aguado and Doug Eboch are guys who walk the walk, and here they talk the talk. They know as well as anyone how to navigate the trickiest waters on the continent: Hollywood's pitching process. Demystifying the secrets of what works and what doesn't for the not-so-brave new world of corporate Movie Biz. It's on my top shelf of books I can't be without.
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5 Ways to Give Your Character a Memorable Entrance

(Spoilers: Well, I mention a lot of films in this post, but since I’m describing character entrances, I wouldn’t call these spoilers.)

There are a lot of reasons to give your significant characters a memorable introduction into the story. It helps the audience know who they should be paying attention to. It can help attract movie stars to the part. And the best introductions establish a core aspect of the character’s nature. First impressions matter, after all. Here are five techniques you can use to make your character’s first appearance on screen fantastic:

1. Advertise the Character. Build anticipation for the character by having other characters talk about them before their appearance. In Casablanca (screenplay by Howard Koch and Julius J. Epstein & Philip G. Epstein), we hear about Rick and Rick’s bar from several people. Renault tells Strasser that “Everybody comes to Rick’s.” In the bar, a patron asks to drink with Rick and is told Rick doesn’t drink with the customers. By the time we see a hand sign “Rick” to a bar tab and pan up to reveal Humphrey Bogart, we are very interested in who this Rick person is.

2. Give the Character a Grand Entrance. The way the character literally enters the scene can draw attention to them. Sometimes this can be as easy as simple as something like Satine lowering down from the ceiling to perform in Moulin Rouge (written by Baz Luhrmann & Craig Pearce). Other times you might have to be more clever. Consider Jack Sparrow’s entrance in Pirates of the Carribean (screen story by Ted Elliott & Terry Rossio and Stuart Beattie and Jay Wolpert, screenplay by Elliott & Rossio). We see him standing gloriously on the mast of his ship… only to realize the ship is slowly sinking. Jack steps off the mast onto the dock just as the ship goes under. This entrance perfectly encapsulates everything important about Jack’s character – his unreasonable confidence, how he constantly skates on the edge of disaster, and his ability to escape by the skin of his teeth.

3. Create a Defining Scene. If we first meet the character in a challenging situation, you can use that scene to show what kind of person they are and why we want to pay attention to them. For example, In Inglorious Basterds (written by Quentin Tarantino), the villain, Landa, is introduced interrogating a farmer as to the whereabouts of a hidden Jewish family. Landa is upbeat and friendly, but very clever, finally tricking the farmer into revealing the family’s location. And once he gets what he wants, he proves to be incredibly brutal. We know exactly what kind of villain Landa is by the end of this scene. Similarly, Indiana Jones’ introduction in Raiders of the Lost Ark (story by George Lucas and Philip Kaufman, screenplay by Lawrence Kasdan), recovering the idol from the booby trapped cave despite betrayal by his “helpers,” shows us how resourceful the character is.

4. Show Us the Character’s Environment. Introducing the character in their typical environment can reveal a lot about them as well. In Little Miss Sunshine (written by Michael Arndt), the dowdy, sparsely populated classroom where Richard is giving his presentation belies his claim to know the secrets of success. In Get Out (written by Jordan Peele), we meet Chris in his stylish city apartment, decorated with photographs he’s taken. This establishes him as hip, urban, and urbane. And when we meet Joan Wilder in Romancing the Stone (written by Diane Thomas), she’s in her apartment putting the finishing touches on a book she’s writing. She celebrates by having a drink… alone with her cat. Her environment tells us what kind of woman she is, in contrast to the sexy, adventurous characters in her books.

5. Use Other Characters’ Reactions. How other characters react to a character can tell us a lot about them. For example, when we meet Sundance in Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid (written by William Goldman), he’s being accused of cheating at a game of Blackjack by Macon. Butch enters and tries to get Sundance to leave. But when Butch finally mentions Sundance’s name, Macon becomes terrified. We can guess from Macon's reaction what a proficient killer Sundance must be.

The introduction of Hannibal Lecter in Silence of the Lambs (screenplay by Ted Tally) demonstrates ALL of these techniques. First, we have Clarice being escorted to Lecter’s cell by the warden. Along the way, the warden tells her how dangerous Hannibal is, and the rules for engaging with him (advertising). We them go deeper and deeper into the facility, through barred gates, to an almost dungeon-like level (advertising, environment). Clarice walks by herself to the last cell which finally reveals Lecter standing ramrod straight in anticipation (grand entrance). The cell is the only one protected by a solid wall of Lucite, and it’s decorated with excellent charcoal drawings (environment). In the scene that follows, Lecter is polite, but uses his wily intellect to manipulate, intimidate, and psychologically torment Clarice (defining scene). Throughout the scene, Clarice is clearly nervous, and when she gets outside, she breaks down crying as she realizes how accurate Lecter’s analysis of her was (character reaction).

It’s no accident Hannibal Lechter is remembered as one of the greatest screen characters of all time.

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The third edition of The Hollywood Pitching Bible is out! If you are in Los Angeles, Ken Aguado and I will be doing a book signing at Book Soup at 7 pm on September 26th. We’d love to see you there! You can RSVP here which will help us ensure we have enough books on hand.

GET OUT Analysis Part Three: Integration of Theme

Spoilers: Get Out (of course!)

After considerable delay (sorry), I’m going to conclude my three-part analysis of Get Out (written by Jordan Peele) by discussing the use of theme. The movie has been widely praised for its exploration of race relations in America. It’s unusual to hear people talk about theme in a genre movie. We typically think commentary on social issues as being the opposite of entertainment. But Get Out uses racial issues and tension to provide a context for the dramatic horror story events. This allows Peele to both make more sophisticated comments on race relations and to use those relations to deliver twists and thrills for the main horror plot.

The most overt aspect of race relations in the plot is the idea of Chris, as a Black man, going to the very white world of his girlfriend’s upper-class family. The very real and understandable anxiety this causes Chris helps to establish the creepy tone that I discussed in my first post on the movie. The act one encounter with the traffic cop, who asks for Chris’s ID even though he isn’t the driver, adds to the sense of danger (more about this scene in a bit).

But initially the white people are mostly not played as racists. In fact, they seem very self-aware about the situation and about the optics of having Black servants. Rather, we are given a look at the more subtle aspects of race relations. It’s easy to say racism is bad. Peele wants us to examine the insidious way it works even when white people are well meaning.

This context also helps create story points and dramatic scenes, which can then illuminate thematic issues. Consider when Chris’s TSA buddy, Rod, goes to the police to report that Chris is missing. He talks to a Black detective, who then brings in other Black detectives to hear Rod’s theory about a white sex slave ring. We assume that they will believe him – but it turns out they think he’s a nut job, which gets a laugh.

What Peele is doing here is playing with audience expectations. This is a form of dramatization. Rather than talky pontificating on the theme, he is finding ways to show us how race works in our society. He achieves this by considering what the audience will expect. Our expectation is that the Black cops will believe Rod's theory… because they’re all Black. In order to reinforce that, Rod clearly shares this belief. By undercutting our expectation, the scene causes us to examine why we believed it to begin with. And from an entertainment perspective, it creates an obstacle for one of our heroes, heightening the drama – we establish that no help is coming from the authorities.

We see this approach again in one of the big twists at the end. When Chris is choking Rose and the police car pulls up, we immediately assume the cop is going to believe Rose, and that Chris will be arrested. We are primed for this belief because of Chris’s treatment at the hands of the cop in act one. So when Rod gets out of the police car instead of a racist white cop, it’s a complete surprise, even though it’s also completely plausible – we knew Rod was looking for Chris. This is a great example of building a twist with the kind of planting and payoff I discussed in the second post in this series, but layering in thematic expectations to create a red herring for the audience.

Another way to explore theme in a movie is through the supporting characters. Not everyone in Get Out expresses the same attitude toward race. Rose’s parents are well meaning but also a little condescending. Rose, meanwhile, expresses shame about her family’s behavior when she and Chris are getting ready for bed at her parents’ house. This is a particularly subtle scene because the subtext is that Rose is delighted to be able to feel superior to her parents. And of course we later discover this was all an act (Rose is a classic shape shifter in the mythology structure archetypes).

Other characters with different thematic perspectives include Rod, who warns Chris not to go to the white people’s house, the wealthy people who think being Black is “cool,” and the blind art dealer who buys Chris not because of his race, but because of his photographic skills. This last one is particularly interesting because the movie has set up a slave auction conspiracy where Black people are only valued physically, but one of the most frightening characters is actually one of the least concerned about race. Again, Peele upends our expectations and makes us think.

It’s easy when discussing theme to get into a literary theory mode, but I try to make this a practical, how-to blog, so let me refocus a bit on some of the techniques I’m discussing here. If you want to do a story with a strong exploration of theme, these are some of the things you should consider:

• Build a context for your story that allows you to dramatize thematic ideas rather than have characters talk about them.
   
• If you really want a thematically complex story, avoid binary thematic approaches (“racism is bad”) in favor of nuance. Present contrasting ideas that challenge a binary interpretation.
   
• Consider audience expectations and undercut them to create entertaining twists that also cause the audience to think.
   
• Give supporting characters different attitudes on the theme.

Most importantly, tell a dramatic story about a real character with a relatable dilemma, and create entertaining scenes. Get Out succeeds because it’s suspenseful, emotional, and funny. The thematic elements heighten the entertainment value rather than bogging the story down. And the audience is open to thinking about the thematic elements because they are enjoying the experience of watching the movie.


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Get Out Analysis Part Two: Planting and Payoff

(SPOILERS: Get Out – of course!)

This week I continue my analysis of writing techniques in the horror movie Get Out (written by Jordan Peele) by looking at the use of planting and payoff. Planting and payoff is a powerful tool for screenwriters that can serve many purposes.

First, it helps make story points believable. In the third act of Get Out, we discover that the character of Dean is doing surgery to transplant brains from one body to another. We believe he is capable of that because in act one it was established that he is a neurosurgeon. If we got to act three and someone said, “Oh, by the way, Dean’s a neurosurgeon,” it might seem arbitrary and convenient, a cheat by the writer. But planting it earlier makes it part of the reality of the story.

Planting and payoff can also build trust in the audience that the things they are seeing have meaning. It’s helpful to plant something and then pay it off early in the film to build that trust. For example, Rose tells Chris that her father (Dean) would have voted for Obama a third time if he could've, and then Dean tells Chris the same thing shortly after they meet. And on the drive up, Rose throws Chris’s cigarette out of the window, and then Dean notices Chris’s nervous hand and asks if he’s a smoker. Chris replies that he’s trying to quit.

These little early connections between scenes are particularly useful in Get Out considering the long build up to the more explicit horror elements that I discussed in my last post. Because we know the things we see aren’t just random and will pay off in the story, we stay patient, trying to unravel the clues we’re being given, trusting that there is something to unravel.

Planting can also serve to establish a fact that can be used later for dramatic effect. For example, in act one we learn that Rose’s grandfather was an Olympic caliber runner. We later learn that his brain has been put in the body of Walter, the groundskeeper, who we saw running at night. So when Rose says, “Get him, Grandpa” to Walter, we know that Chris probably won’t be able to outrun his pursuer.

Similarly, we learn in the party scene that a camera flash can temporarily restore the original consciousness to a victim. Chris then uses that knowledge to get out of a predicament at the end of the film.

One of the most satisfying things in a story is when the character is put in a seemingly impossible predicament, and then cleverly – and believably – gets out of it. Get Out has a particularly brilliant example of this at the end of act two. Chris is tied to a chair in the basement of the family house as they prepare to operate on him. He’s been hypnotized so that he passes out whenever someone taps a teacup three times with a spoon. He appears completely helpless.

But then Chris turns the tables on his captors by putting cotton in his ears and feigning unconsciousness when the teacup is tapped. And this moment is made possible by two excellent uses of planting and payoff.

One is Chris’s habit of scratching at the arm of a chair when he’s nervous. We learned earlier that this stems from when he was home alone as a child and his mother didn’t return as expected. It’s reinforced when we see Chris scratch at the chair as Missy (Rose’s mother) asks him uncomfortable questions. So we aren’t surprised when we see Chris scratch at the arm of the chair he’s tied to at the end of act two. But it is this scratching that exposes the chair’s cotton stuffing that he uses to plug his ears.

The average viewer may not appreciate how carefully the writer set this up. Almost certainly, Peele had the idea of Chris stopping up his ears with cotton from the chair first, and then went back and planted the scratching behavior to make that plausible. Peele established the behavior so we don’t question it when it happens.

But by setting up the behavior, Peele also distracts us from the twist. We assume the scratching is in the scene merely as a sign of Chris’s anxiety and don’t anticipate how it will save him. When you want to have a twist, you need to lay the expositional groundwork to make the twist believable, but that risks giving it away. By giving the plant another purpose in the scene, you misdirect the audience.

The other great use of plant and payoff that is critical to this scene is the tapping on the cup. The tapping trigger and its effect is established in the hypnotism scene (we actually get a foreshadowing of it when the family is sitting on the deck after Chris first arrives.) It first pays off when he’s trying to leave, and Missy taps the teacup to incapacitate him. We now fully understand the rules of the device.

This device can then be used when Chris escapes from the chair. When we see the teacup in the video, we know what will happen. And when Chris pulls the cotton from his ears later, we understand how he foiled the villains without needing some clunky explanation in dialogue.

The device pays off one more time when Chris encounters Missy on the way out of the house. Both their gazes go to a teacup on the table. They both lunge for it. Chris gets there first and knocks the cup to the floor. Missy is foiled. By establishing the device for the audience, the writer can use it to create interesting drama in later scenes.

Planting and payoff also help establish and explore the racial themes that made Get Out a movie with cultural impact. I’ll explore that more in my next post.

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“Get Out” Analysis Part One: Building and Maintaining Psychological Horror

(SPOILERS: Get Out – of course!)

In the spirit of Halloween, I’m going to do several posts analyzing some of the writing techniques that made the horror movie Get Out (written by Jordan Peele) so successful earlier this year. How successful? It made more than $175 million on a budget of less than $5 million… and that’s just the domestic box office! It also scored a stunning 99% Fresh on Rotten Tomatoes. Perhaps more significantly, it became part of the cultural conversation due to its integration of themes of race in America.

One thing that I found interesting about Get Out was that for most of the movie, the main character, Chris, was only vaguely aware of the danger he was in. He sensed that creepy thins were happening, but mostly chalked it up to being a Black man entering a very white world. (This added thematic depth to the movie, something I will discuss in a future post.) The audience experienced the story primarily from Chris’s point of view and was thus also kept in the dark about what was truly going on until well past the halfway mark.

Yet this was a horror movie. The desire to save twists for later in the film posed a challenge for Peele: how to provide the kind of scares that the audience was expecting while believably maintaining the façade for the character that this was simply a visit to his girlfriend’s parents?

One of the first techniques the script employed was using a prologue to set the tone. We see a scene of a young Black man walking in an unfamiliar neighborhood. Soon a car starts to follow him. He tries to avoid the car, but ultimately he is jumped and abducted. This abduction connects to events later in the film, but from a plot standpoint, we don’t really need to see it. However, without this scene, the movie would seem more like a character drama for a good thirty minutes. Using a prologue establishes for the audience that this is a scary movie, and that colors how we read later unsettling events.

There are a few jump scares scattered throughout the movie to keep us on edge – some admittedly a bit cheap. One good one, though, comes about ten minutes in, when Chris and Rose are driving to her parents’ place and a deer jumps in front of the car. This event leads to an encounter with a cop that sets up the danger to Chris in this community. By associating the scare with a relevant story point, it feels integral to the film, as opposed to a cheesy gimmick.

Other moments are designed to make us feel that something sinister is going on at the house. For example, the groundskeeper running at Chris in the middle of the night, and the fact that Georgina, the maid, keeps unplugging his phone while it’s charging and starts crying inexplicably when apologizing to him about it. This sense that there is a secret conspiracy in the house is expanded in the scene when the party goes silent after Chris walks upstairs, and the scene of the strange auction.

The two creepiest moments in acts one and two come at major structural points: At the end of act one, Missy hypnotizes Chris against his will, sending him plummeting into the floor. When he wakes up, he can’t really remember this clearly – allowing the writer to have his cake and eat it too. The audience knows what Missy has done, but understands why Chris doesn’t take action. This serves the purpose of act one by locking Chris into the story – we know he can no longer leave without dealing with whatever’s been done to him.

The next big structural point is the Midpoint, and this comes when Chris tries to take a picture of the young Black man at the party. The flash does something to the man, and he tells Chris to “Get out!” Now things start moving a little more quickly. Chris decides he wants to leave the house, though that will not prove as easy as he expects. The threat finally comes into the open when he discovers the pictures of Rose with a parade of other Black men, revealing she is in on the secret plot. The danger becomes even more explicit as we move to the Act Two Turning Point – when Chris wakes up tied to the chair and a video reveals what’s in store for him. From there, things unfold more like most horror movies.

It is important to deliver on the genre promises of your stories. And it’s important that you deliver on the genre throughout the film. Peele wanted to save the real suspense and action for act three, so he had to find ways to create and build tension as he was building to that point. He walked a careful balance between keeping the psychological horror present without giving away the twists.

It’s important that most of the creepy, inexplicable moments scattered through the first two thirds of Get Out end up paying off in Act Three. They aren’t just random scares created for tone; they grow out of the story. This kind of planting and payoff is one of the strengths of the script. I’ll delve into that topic in part two of my analysis.

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"I used to always recommend that new writers read Story as their first and most important introduction to the craft of screenwriting, but from now on, I’m going to recommend The Three Stages of Screenwriting."
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